Sorry, I thought that was funny as hell. You all know it's satire, right, not Dylan?

You all know it's satire, right, not Dylan?

It has been so long since I have seen Bob Dylan live I doubt I could remember exactly what he looks like. ;)

he prolly doesn't remember you either...outta sight, outta mind thing.

I would say you are right. As Security we were there to keep the crowd under control and keep people out of back stage area that did not belong there.

I got to whip a lot of butt and throw out a bunch of jerks. I even had to have a few arrested.

One time we were working a concert at the Cubby Bear Lounge. That was kiddie corner to Wrigley Field. Me and another guy were standing in front of the sound board. This guy bumps into me and we almost both fall on the sound board.

I grab him and he says, "Hey man, I was pushed." I look right and this kid is pushing his way thru the crowd. I reach out and pop him in the head. It turned out his sister was right behind him. She starts to slap me in the face and then that kid I popped starts hitting me in the head.

I pushed her away from me and then I reached out and put my arm around the kid's neck and pulled him in close so he couldn't hit me again. So I start to push him toward the door. He turned on me twice and each time I would push him again.

So I said, "Go ahead and turn around again." He did. I gave him and open palm left, right in the kisser. I was wearing leather gloves so it made that distinctive sound, "THWACK".

One of our guys was standing on a chair by the door that went downstairs to the dressing room. When I gave that kid the open palm he hollered, "Pancake face!"

He flew into the doorway and Archie grabbed him by the hair on top of his head and winged him out the door.

The chick tried to kick me in the nuts from behind but she couldn't do it. I turn around and grab her by her blouse and threw her out the door after him.

The woosie called his mother.

She was standing there wanting to take notes. I told her, "This happened on the premises. I am Security and what I say goes. They were both hitting me. I could just as easily have charged them both with battery. I just threw them out. So count your blessings and leave now." ;)