Media Says Spike In Myocarditis May Be Linked To Ukraine Crisis Health

Source: https://babylonbee.com/news/media-says-spike-in-myocarditis-may-be-linked-to-ukraine-crisis
Published: Mar 8, 2022
Author: BabylonBee
Post Date: 2022-03-08 08:32:56 by Ada
Views: 1180

U.S.—Thousands of people across the US have been diagnosed with some form of myocarditis, a potentially deadly but rare inflammation of the heart muscle. Media reports say the dramatic spike in cases may be linked to the Ukraine crisis.

"Correlation does not equal causation," said CNN anchor Anderson Cooper. "But this time it may. The nation is currently reeling from an uptick in myocarditis cases as Russia invades Ukraine. Honestly, we really can't think of anything else in the world that could possibly be causing this."

According to sources, Cooper had invited Dr. Fauci on the program but couldn't get a hold of him because he'd also been diagnosed with myocarditis.

Rachel Maddow of MSNBC also noted the striking correlation. "As Ukrainians fight for their homeland, are they also suffering from myocarditis?" she said on her program. "It's certainly the case with Americans. Are we, as a nation, so sympathetic for Ukraine's cause that our hearts are literally breaking? This random nuclear scientist says 'yes.'"

Though an enlarged heart from myocarditis is not technically the same as a broken or ruptured heart, it remains the consensus of media reporting that Russia is directly responsible for the failing health of vaccinated Americans, though medical professionals have thus far disagreed with the notion.

CNN's Don Lemon agreed that myocarditis was certainly related to Ukraine, but did propose another possibility. "There's also an alarming correlation between myocarditis and high gas prices that we simply cannot overlook. Could our hearts be enlarged by climate change?"

"Anonymous sources say absolutely."

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#1: Esso    To: Ada, 4um (#0)

CNN's Don Lemon agreed that myocarditis was certainly related to Ukraine, but did propose another possibility. "There's also an alarming correlation between myocarditis and high gas prices that we simply cannot overlook. Could our hearts be enlarged by climate change?"

This is Thursday's news, Ada. Stop it!

Esso posted on 2022-03-08 08:36:39   Reply   Private Reply


#2: Mommy Warrior1    To: Ada (#0)

Media Says Spike In Myocarditis May Be Linked To Ukraine Crisis Health

Are you referring to the bio-labs Putin had already planned to destroy in Ukraine? If they were manufacturing the bio-weapons being used as vaccinations then this is exactly the cause of increased myocarditis amongst children, athletes, and those with no such history. But that's not all one gets in their jabs (unless lucky enough to get saline.

Mommy Warrior1 posted on 2022-03-08 13:44:24   Reply   Private Reply


#3: Dakmar    To: Ada (#0)

Silly me, I thought myocarditis was caused by anti-semitism.

Dakmar posted on 2022-03-08 13:58:55   Reply   Private Reply


#4: Mommy Warrior1    To: Esso (#1)

Could our hearts be enlarged by climate change?"

Not likely! Climate change may have been affected by man-made pollutants, toxins, chemicals we're constantly being exposed to through deliberate means, such as chem-trails, cloud seeding, weather modification & more. "Climate-change" is a 'buzz' word like "Sustainability;" By making people believe that survival of our planet means making drastic reductions (90-95% depopulation!) and everything else the New World Order requires. It's a ruse and much of the world remains asleep.

Mommy Warrior1 posted on 2022-03-08 14:01:51   Reply   Private Reply


#5: StraitGate    To: Dakmar (#3)

I thought it was caused by using correct pronouns.

StraitGate posted on 2022-03-08 14:56:37   Reply   Private Reply


#6: Mommy Warrior1    To: Ada (#0)

"Correlation does not equal causation," said CNN anchor Anderson Cooper. Rachel Maddow of MSNBC also noted the striking correlation.

If this got posted more than once, it was unintentional :( Hope I'm allowed to say this here, but the word "freedom" seems to mean such different things to different people. Perhaps it's based on how, where, and by whom we first learn about freedom...and truth because it's the truth that will set us free. Raised in a Christian home,I credit mostly my Dad for the priceless tools that make me a seeker (derogatorily referred to as obsessive) of truth & justice. My Dad also taught me to question everything you're told-- respectfully; the truth requires confirmation-- by credible sources. The Word of God is the ONLY unwavering, consistent measurement of morality--right & wrong there's ever been. Since there's only one truth, we must start asking ourself which has evidence to back it up. There are different ways of looking at it, but the false, deceptive "truths" will stop making sense when you look at something that does. By finding alternative news sources is getting easier every day. Google the owners of all the mainstream media outlets, with the only exception I'm aware of being Tucker Carlson on Fox. If anybody wants truth you will NEVER hear any from the mouths running at MSNBC,CNN,(CNN- Children's Nude Network) recently had two major staff members arrested for pediphelia. If you think truth comes from this filth, you're gravely mistaken. This site here offers some gateways to truth and those seeking it. Once a person begins to wake up and rub that life-long sleep from your eyes, he/she will be at a major fork in the road. The right path seems almost too bright and unfamiliar to choose, but the dimmer path never led you anywhere, despite always moving. It's up to you to choose life or death, but there's not a lot of time now. Consider not just now, but the future one beyond this temporal one. There's so many others, some holding out their hand, others may try to grab yours with that same bit of faith. Until one builds up their faith (in God and His many children), you too can lean on others that woke up before you. It's no exaggeration to declare the mainstream media a divisive threat to our very existence -- literally. Mainstream media has been a weaponized and can actually be responsible for causing wars and the great genocide of the majority of world's population. Please wake up and open your eyes!!!

Mommy Warrior1 posted on 2022-03-09 21:58:08   Reply   Private Reply


#7: NeoconsNailed    To: Esso (#1)

This is Thursday's news, Ada. Stop it!

What's your problem?

NeoconsNailed posted on 2022-03-09 22:56:44   Reply   Private Reply


#8: NeoconsNailed    To: Mommy Warrior1 (#4)

Amen, Mommy Warrior1! And welcome welcome -- how did you discoved us?

NeoconsNailed posted on 2022-03-09 22:59:12   Reply   Private Reply


#9: Esso    To: NeoconsNailed (#7)

I was kidding. It's a Bee story about to come true.

It might not though, the stories of Vlad bombing baby hospitals are starting.

Esso posted on 2022-03-09 22:59:43   Reply   Private Reply


#10: NeoconsNailed    To: Esso (#9)

NeoconsNailed posted on 2022-03-09 23:26:39   Reply   Private Reply


#11: Pinguinite    To: Mommy Warrior1 (#4)

Hello, MW1. Welcome!

Pinguinite posted on 2022-03-11 10:53:54   Reply   Private Reply


#12: TommyTheMadArtist    To: Ada (#0)

All I know is that since this nonsense started I have had a low grade migraine as my Bullshit-o- meter and Speech Filter has been working overtime.

This is why I think I need to take a vacation. Not from my city, but this planet. Come back in 1000 a years to see the world in the aftermath of the idiocy that once was. Hopefully by then we’ll see an improvement. Not likely, but there’s always the chance that one of these talking monkeys on this planet might have the right ideas that catch on.

TommyTheMadArtist posted on 2022-03-11 13:07:36   Reply   Private Reply