John Kerry chokes on an oyster cracker and dies. He goes to hell where the devil is waiting for him. "I don't know what to do here" says the devil.
"You're on my list but I have no room for you. But you definitely have to stay here for eternity, so I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I've got three folks here who weren't quite as bad as you. I'll let one of them go, but you have to take their place. I'll even let YOU decide who leaves."
John Kerry thought that sounded good so he agrees.
The devil opened the first room: in it was Ted Kennedy in a large pool of water. He kept diving in and surfacing empty-handed, over and over. Such was his fate in hell.
"No!" John said. "I don't think so! I'm not a good swimmer and I don't think I could do that all day long!"
The devil led John to the second room: in it was Jane Fonda with a sledgehammer and a room full of rocks. All she did was swing that sledgehammer, time after time after time.
"No, I've got a problem with my shoulder. I would be in constant agony if all I could do was break rocks all day!" commented John.
The devil opened the third door. In it, John saw Bill Clinton, lying on the floor with his arms staked over his head, and his legs staked in spread-eagle pose.
Bent over him was Monica Lewinski, doing what she does best.
John Kerry looked at this in disbelief for a while and finally said, "Yeah, I can handle this!" The devil smiled and said, "OK, Monica, you're free to go!"
#1: titorite To: Lod (#0)
titorite posted on 2022-06-09 17:35:57 Reply Private Reply
#2: Esso To: Lod (#0)
Esso posted on 2022-06-09 17:41:16 Reply Private Reply
#3: BTP Holdings To: Lod (#0)
Eat the cookie, Mary, er John. LOL
BTP Holdings posted on 2022-06-09 18:09:38 Reply Private Reply
#4: Esso To: Lod (#0)
Esso posted on 2022-06-09 18:46:23 Reply Private Reply
#5: BTP Holdings To: Esso (#4)
BTP Holdings posted on 2022-06-09 20:12:20 Reply Private Reply
#6: Lod To: BTP Holdings, 4um (#5)
A group of 40 years old buddies discuss and discuss where they should meet for dinner.
Finally it is agreed upon that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the waitress's
there have low cut blouses and nice boobs.
10 years later, at 50 years of age, the group once again discuss and discuss where they should meet
for dinner. Finally it is agreed that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the food
there is very good and the wine selection is good also.
10 years later at 60 years of age, the group once again discuss and discuss where they should meet
for dinner. Finally it is agreed that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because they can
eat there in peace and quiet and the restaurant had a beautiful view of the ocean.
10 years later, at 70 years of age, the group once again discuss and discuss where they should meet
for dinner. Finally it is agreed that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the
restaurant is wheel chair accessible and they even have an elevator.
10 years later, at 80 years of age, the group once again discuss and discuss where they should meet
for dinner. Finally it is agreed that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant
because they have never been there before.
Lod posted on 2022-06-09 21:26:11 Reply Private Reply
#7: BTP Holdings To: Lod (#6)
Let's all meet Al Heimer there also. ;)
BTP Holdings posted on 2022-06-10 22:34:26 Reply Private Reply