Jam Handy to the Rescue!

Source: MST3K
Published: 2025-04-28
Author: MST3K
Post Date: 2026-06-21 10:46:10 by Esso
Views: 139

Kim didn't know, I'd be surprised if many folks did...


https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLNIWjxkpFFy93B08_wA7zbiWG-ZXGguQb    [Playlist 23 videos]

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#1: ghostrider    To: Esso (#0)

 

 

Why don't skeletons fight each other?

They don't have the guts.

 

 

ghostrider posted on 2026-06-21 10:56:42   Reply   Private Reply


#2: Esso    To: All (#0)

At least the infamous 'Coffee Mug Incident' event has ended. Doc's tea doesn't taste like onions and she's agreed not to move to Scotland to be with Lord Commander Studley.
We went shopping this morning. At Amazon. Kim really hates the Clown Car.
Just as well, her side is full of junk mail. Saves cleaning it out.
I got a new pair of carpenter jeans. The crotch is blown out in mine and they're getting pretty thin. The permadirt won't come out either.
A new pair of black shoes, mine are about shot. 80 bux seems kind of pricey, hopefully they're comfortable.
A half pound of pure stevia powder, something like 6,500 servings, I seldom use sugar. A 1/4 tsp. replaces 2 cups of cane sugar. An 1/8 tsp. sweetens a whole pot of tea.
An LED nightlight for the bottom of my stairs. Mine's so dim it's useless after 15+ years.
I haven't been in a store other than Kroger or the dollar store for years. I only go there to get cheap greeting cards.

 

 

The mainstream media and scientific bodies chose to ignore a climate declaration, signed by over 1,100 (and later, even more) scientists.

The 'World Climate Declaration' was published in September, 2019, by CLINTEL (Climate Intelligence), a Netherlands-based group. It argued there is no climate crisis or emergency and criticised overreliance on worst-case scenarios based on computer modelling.

The declaration pointed to empirical data of biomass expansion, noting that 'CO2 is plant food'—a reality now backed by verified NASA satellite data showing significant global greening over recent decades. They emphasised the biological benefits of CO2 for global greening, and argued that climate policies must respect economic realities and national sovereignty.

However, critics of this paper were more focussed on who signed it, saying only a small percentage were publishing climate scientists or paleoclimatologists. Many were engineers, geologists, or professionals from unrelated fields.

This was a collision between an entrenched, centrally coordinated climate machine and a bloc of independent professionals, drawn from engineering, economic and industrial backgrounds, arguing the practical, physical constraints and costs of such an all-encompassing global energy transition.

The declaration said climate models had serious flaws. But the climate campaigners were on a roll, and said they alone represented mainstream science. They had built a body of evidence on the calibrated data of satellite and ocean temperatures. The 'short-term pain of transitioning to net zero was preferable to the long-term instability and economic damage from uncontrolled climate change.

This posture allowed them to freely portray the 'rate of warming' as unprecedented in modern human history. The mainstream media backed them. The declaration was labeled 'fringe' overnight by major academic journals.

The economic fallout from dismantling the global energy infrastructure has in fact been colossal, now estimated at $275 trillion and counting. The 1,100 strong declaration did not break through into this entrenched policy circle because of its institutional barriers to outsiders. These doors were permanently closed.

The UN, major central banks and Western governments were already colluding clandestinely with each other, plus global asset managers like BlackRock and Vanguard. They owned the science. They owned the carbon cash fallout. Now they owned the sovereignty as well.

The climate narrative is high-stakes rhetoric, slick propaganda that downplays the gradual collapse of western economies, once based on cheap coal, oil and gas. This mainstream narrative is what captured the public's attention with its high-stakes rhetoric, bypassing the need for a professionally structured, data-driven approach that would be much harder for independent critics to dismiss.

The campaign was spearheaded by claims of 'global boiling' - 'code red for humanity' rhetoric filled the news pages and dominated politicised shouting matches. The UN and associated bodies shifted their position from 'advisory' scientific panels to becoming the world's global economic managers.

The conversation wasn't about atmospheric physics. It was about rusted-on, centralised, top-down control and ownership. But when policies move faster than engineering realities, like grid stability and battery storage limits, then economic hardship becomesss the inevitable price.

That is exactly how it has turned out.

 

 

 

 

Veterinarian Dr. John Robb: "OUR PETS ARE DYING... THOUSANDS of pets are dying every day from vaccines they don't need."

"The LAW is forcing people to kill their pets, but I WON'T do it."

Vaccines cause a drastic rise in chronic diseases: diabetes, cancer & heart failure.

Our family pets are being poisoned for profit:

- No Limits on Over-Vaccination: There are ZERO rules capping how many times pets can be jabbed for the same disease, leading to deadly overdosing.

- Size Doesn't Matter—But It Should: Vaccines aren't adjusted for body weight; a tiny 5lb cat gets the SAME dose as a 100lb dog, risking lethal reactions.

- Rising Chronic Illnesses: Over-vaccinating & over-medicating is skyrocketing pet diseases like diabetes, cancer, kidney failure & heart issues.

- Toxic Pet Food Alert: Grain-based dry foods loaded with byproducts, seed oils & chemicals are wrecking dogs' & cats' health.

- Titer Tests Ignored: If pets show positive antibodies via titers (just like humans), they shouldn't need more shots—but vets push them anyway.

- Big Food's Grip: Mars Candy owns 3,000+ vet clinics & 50+ pet food brands, prioritizing profits over pet lives with unnecessary meds, tests & services.

- Whistleblowers Silenced: Dr. Robb faced backlash from Mars for refusing to follow harmful vaccination policies—research shows full doses are "dangerous" & "potentially lethal."

- Vet Suicide Crisis: Veterinarians pushing for change are ignored, taunted & laughed at in hearings, contributing to a suicide rate 4X higher than the general population.

Stop the madness! Protect your pets — & say NO to unnecessary vaccines.

https://x.com/ValerieAnne1970/status/2068317950650585104   [Video]

 

 

 

 

The new Air Force One if Democrats ever regain power

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

They never race on Mother's Day. I guess it would be bad form for mother's to watch their sons dying in crashes.

 

1969 Buick Century Cruiser concept

This wild ride was designed for long range freeway driving

It came with comforts such as a refrigerator and swivel seats. Sadly, it was not produced #1960s

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

SHOCKING DISCOVERY THEY BURIED

Dr. Richard Urso EXPLAINS how they deliberately used cancer cells to prove that hydroxychloroquine was ineffective against the virus!

"But in reality it was proven to work perfectly because it protects healthy cells and allows the virus to attack the cancer cells.

Because a cheap, decades-old drug that could selectively destroy cancer would be catastrophic for the multi-trillion dollar cancer industry.

They don't want you to know this. They want you to depend on expensive treatments forever.

The truth is OUT THERE. SHARE IT before they bury it again.

https://x.com/e3z9b_qI1ytkw/status/2068472105474109743    [Video]

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Esso posted on 2026-06-21 12:42:43   Reply   Private Reply


#3: Esso    To: ghostrider (#1)

The weather is behaving nicely. 73 now with some rain coming in an hour or two. It's supposed to stay below 80 for the next ten days.
I turned on my A/C a little bit ago when the downstairs hit 77. Don't want my company to get overheated. I'm good to 80.
We got dinner mostly figured out early today, chicken wings or bacon-wrapped meatballs with fettuccini alfredo or cheddar and broccoli rice for a side.
When it gets closer, I'm going to tell her I want the fettuccini so she picks the rice.

My tomato plant is doing good, it's about 4', bushy with a ton of blossoms, but I'm not seeing any baby 'maters yet.
I hope I'm not having some weird pollination failure or something. Botany isn't my strong suit.

Anyhoo, Kim's been skunkin' around and has a bunch of stuff she wants me to post. Here we go with mine mixed in. I feel like a DJ.

Kim wanted me to get one of these to wear over my gun, but I don't want to get into a firefight because I triggered some shitlib at Kroger. My get out of jail free card expired in 2009.
It might be a nice collector's item, though.
My dad died in April 1976. Kinda took the fun out of the Bicentennial for me. I was 14.

 

 

 

Aaron Rodgers

 

 

I could go for that too. Our weekends are too short and Kim won't drink on Sundays. [24 hours bottle to office]

 

 

 

They say my house is worth $150k. I wouldn't give you $10k for it. I can imagine the neighborhood...

 

Take a guess why. - Kim

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

That pisses me off. - Kim

Don't let her fool you. Kimmy looks 40, tops - Esso

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

BREAKING - Henry Nowak’s killer, Vickrum Digwa, has been transferred to HMP Frankland, the UK’s most notorious prison for “inmate justice,” where he now remains in fear for his life to the point at which he can no longer eat or sleep.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Pac was involuntarily committed to Park Center for 48 hour observation when his ex girlfriend got mad at him and called the police and told them he was going to commit suicide because he wouldn't give her a credit card. He said it was like being on a cruise and was mad when they released him. Knowing him he was hitting on every woman in there. It's a co-ed facility. Kim

 

 

 

Too bad they're not open on Sunday.

 

 

 

 

IYKYK...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Esso posted on 2026-06-21 16:01:05   Reply   Private Reply


#4: Esso    To: Esso (#3)

I just had a Father's day flashback thinking about my father.
I remember him and Jim conspiring to hook two VCRs together to duplicate rental porn movies in the 70s.
When I met Jim he had an illegal radio station in a storage room behind his mother's house with two record players tape players microphones and a thing to control it all.
And a ratty old couch. I can't believe he's not dead from STIs knowing what I know now.
When I mentioned that Pac showed me a plastic badge that says WLSQ STEREO STAFF JIM that is in his desk drawer.
And two porn videos in another drawer.
He hasn't changed much maybe slowed down a little.
At least that's what he says.
Kim

Esso posted on 2026-06-21 17:42:56   Reply   Private Reply


#5: Esso    To: ghostrider (#4)

Kimmy's a little spunky today. I think her Scottish BF has her a little wet.
She's been portraying me on X all day, I hope she doesn't get me banned again.
 A couple notes of correction:
Illegal = not licensed.
Record players are turntables. [Record players with their bases taken off and mounted on a dedicated table]
Hooking two VCRs together was easy with a a few RCA coax cables, but it was the 70s.
As far as the STDs, she's correct. Legend has it that I have a son, but the woman didn't want to go to prison, I was a minor.

I better get dinner on the way. As horned-up as Doc is, we probably should get her upstairs ASAP for some he'in and she'in. 
0400 comes early every Monday. BS DST has it at way too early. [Zero-dark hundred]

The bootleg radio station is is an interesting story. It was QRP [low power, less than 5W]
I should write about that. I wasn't the mastermind, but became it.

The rain dissipated before it got here. Must be from the heat and steam of the city.

 


Esso posted on 2026-06-21 18:30:47   Reply   Private Reply


#6: Esso    To: ghostrider (#1)

It was a pretty good day.
I don't expect much next week.
I'll look at the 'Chicks on the Right' after Kim leaves tomorrow and get a couple more hours pained sleep.
"White Scottish man" will be the board-of-fare, I think.

I love Slavic gals. Elton John, not so much.

Esso posted on 2026-06-21 18:50:28   Reply   Private Reply


#7: Esso    To: ghostrider (#6)

The rice may have simmered too long. I was distracted.

Bacon wrapped meatballs it was.

Esso posted on 2026-06-21 19:56:21   Reply   Private Reply


#8: ghostrider    To: Esso (#3)

 

 

Pac was involuntarily committed to Park Center for 48 hour observation when his ex girlfriend got mad at him and called the police and told them he was going to commit suicide because he wouldn't give her a credit card. He said it was like being on a cruise and was mad when they released him. Knowing him he was hitting on every woman in there. It's a co-ed facility.

 

 

 

ghostrider posted on 2026-06-21 22:06:57   Reply   Private Reply


#9: ghostrider    To: Esso (#7)

 

 

ghostrider posted on 2026-06-21 22:19:11   Reply   Private Reply


#10: Esso    To: ghostrider (#9)

Locals are drawing England flags on trash down their street so the council comes and collects it faster. Genius.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Starmer's replacement, another homo/pedo.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Esso posted on 2026-06-23 11:38:30   Reply   Private Reply


#11: Esso    To: ghostrider (#8)

Chris is gonna be pissed when he gets up in a little bit.
They're resurfacing Holly today [N-S main cross street].
A big triax dump truck used his gravel driveway to turn around and tore the shit out of it.
It really messed up the asphalt in the street in front of his driveway, big chunks tore up.
I should text him Park Center's phone number. He's gonna be BIG MAD.
He's been bitchin' about the condition of our street for a couple years now.

 

 

 

 

 

Dumbass pol said Elon killed 4.5 million kids with DOGE cuts. Lawsuit incoming.

 

He's a homo/pedo so he's qualified.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Definately not my garages...

 

 

Told a Muzz to fuck off and go home, lost her job.

 

The only time I have my phone is if I leave the house so I can call a tow truck.

 

 

 

 

Esso posted on 2026-06-23 13:36:01   Reply   Private Reply


#12: Esso    To: All (#11)

BREAKING: Elon Musk calls out Ro Khanna as his household wealth reportedly grew from roughly $27–46 million to an estimated $232.7 million.

• 631 million total trade volume across 38,666 trades since entering Congress, most prolific Democratic trader in House history.

• 2022 investigation found 15% overlap between his legislative work and family stock holdings

• Ro Khanna’s AI-focused trades returned +112.1% excess over the S&P 500 from January 2024 through April 2026, far beating Nancy Pelosi’s +38.5% outperformance.

• 143% return on Nvidia shares bought via wife’s trust in Feb 2024, right before CHIPS Act helped double the stock

Ro 'the Robber' Khanna seems to be the most active insider trader in Congress.

BREAKING: Elon Musk indicates he's SUING Rep. Ro Khanna (D) after Khanna said Elon needs to answer for '4.5 million kids dying' because of DOGE cuts

ELON: "Time to sue this liar."

"The reality is that money was being sent to corrupt politicians under the guise of aid! Liars and stock insider traders like Ro the Robber should be in prison!!"

"The standard applied by DOGE was very simple and easy: Provide contact information for the recipients of aid, so that we can confirm it is not fraudulent."

Wow! @ElonMusk is going MAXIMUM FAFO MODE!

Esso posted on 2026-06-23 14:07:28   Reply   Private Reply


#13: Esso    To: All (#12)

BREAKING: More than $150,000 has been raised in just over 24 hours for Dasha, the Texas woman who was doxxed, fired from her job, and subjected to death threats after confronting two Muslim women at a grocery store.

The women allegedly instigated the encounter and began filming. Dasha responded:

“This is not a Muslim country, this is a Christian country. You need to leave. You worship a terrorist who is a warlord, a pedophile, and Islam is a terrorist organization. You're not welcome here. You need to go back to your Islamic country where you came from.”

 

 

Esso posted on 2026-06-23 14:10:21   Reply   Private Reply


#14: Esso    To: ghostrider (#13)

Oh boy, the stupid is THICC today and I've got a seat in the front row to watch it unfold.
They came back and "fixed" the damage they did to the street. If I didn't hate lawyers so bad, I'd be on the horn now.
I'm pissed, Lopez is gonna be mad as hell when he gets home and Chris won't believe what he'll see.
I wish I could post a pic. I was stupid not to buy a 4x4 when I got my Tacoma in 2013, but I wasn't planning on city-installed tank traps on my street.
I might see how much Chip will charge to convert it or the Clown Car.
I don't know what they were thinkin', I bet they had a third of a triax of asphalt left and time to kill before packing it in at 1500.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

That's consistent of what's happening my county.

 

 

 

 

 

Egypt.

 

 

 

 

 

 

JUST IN: Benjamin Song, the ringleader of the North Texas Antifa terror cell, has been sentenced to 100 YEARS in federal prison today in Fort Worth.

 

 

Esso posted on 2026-06-23 16:36:03   Reply   Private Reply


#15: Esso    To: All (#14)

We Asked AI To Simulate If The U.S. Had A Second Civil War [Babylon Bee, pretty cute]

https://x.com/TheBabylonBee/status/2069504005445980168    [Video]

Esso posted on 2026-06-23 17:07:44   Reply   Private Reply


#16: Esso    To: ghostrider (#15)

Ghost, I ping you to threads because I think it's good for thread count.
I think folks might click on it to see if I'm gonna spill some deep, dark secret.
I've gotta be pretty tuned up to do that, besides, Kimmy did good enough on her own last Sunday.
I should have her arrested for HIPPA violations, but hot babes are hard to come by at 65.
I'm lucky she didn't get me banned on X. She pretends to be me to chase off 'weekday GFs.'

 

 

 

 

 

Trump and his gang

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

New job...

 

 

 

School suspends a 5-year-old for fighting.

Dad gets called in. Expecting him to apologize, punish his son, and play the good little parent.

Instead the dad listens to his son:

“This kid was picking on me at recess. I asked him to stop. He didn’t.”

Then the dad turns to the principal and says what every father in America has been thinking:

“So you don’t even know what the bully was doing to my kid… but you’re suspending MY son for ending it?”

He looks at the bully kid and says:

“You gonna think twice before you bully my son again.”

Then he turns to his boy, gives him knuckles right there in the office in front of the principal, assistant principal, counselor, and nurse:

“Son, I’m proud of you. You ain’t suspended. You got a three-day vacation. It’s hunting season. Let’s go.”

Zero tolerance policies are a joke.

They only tolerate one thing: kids who won’t defend themselves.

This dad just reminded every weak administrator in America what real parenting looks like.

Raise men. Not victims.

https://x.com/HistorianUSA1/status/2069498579421450319

 

 

 

 

 

Meanwhile, aboard the plane heading back to Europe from the World Cup in America…

 

 

 

This one just got arrested for having sex with a SEVEN year old.

 

 

 

Two absolute faggots.

 

 

 

 

Graham Platner (@grahamformaine): Thanks to Planned Parenthood, I’ve been able to get tested for STDs

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Esso posted on 2026-06-23 19:36:51   Reply   Private Reply


#17: Esso    To: All (#16)

 

 

 

 

 

I'm OK, always am.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Graham Platner, are you sure there’s nothing else that’s going to come out?”

- “No, everything’s out there.”

Today:

 

 

Put Kim's hair on her and she'd be cute...

OK, I talked to Walter "Radar" Lopez about the street. He wants me to fix it with the city. I can't do that. 

I told him to call 411 in a couple days if they don't fix it. FW knows I'm ex-CIA and dispatches police. Multiple squads.

That CF is OVER. Done deal.

Esso posted on 2026-06-23 21:10:35   Reply   Private Reply


#18: Esso    To: All (#17)

EweToob AI is picking the songs, not me...

 

I keep a handcuff key lightly sewn into the back of my jeans. I buy them a dozen at a time on Amazon. I don't like being in custody.

There's no reason to restrain me. If there was, you'd be dead. [See Jason Hanson (CIA)]

 

 

Esso posted on 2026-06-23 21:35:21   Reply   Private Reply


#19: Esso    To: All (#18)

 

Sheinbaum. jooo.

Esso posted on 2026-06-23 22:46:48   Reply   Private Reply